i'm back from sec2 camp!
felt so shaggggg for the 2nd time. first time of course its OBS.
i didn't know that such normal camps could actually cause everyone to be so shag.
nothing much. group that i facilitate is not bad, some are not that enthu. overall was alright.
campfire is not that expected. no party night. homewardbound.

back home, changed, then wait for my mum. after that, went to NP for colorvision check.
shunbian pay school fees and buy laptop. now i'm using my laptop for typing because desktop keyboard can't be used. dumb old com. :P
went there to wait for caiyan. sabrina came too. bought laptop then went home. but got to go back again to install my course software.
that's all. (:

stressed. school, family, home, relationship, cash...
school just caused my mum a BIG hole! and i can't do much to lessen her burden.
i seriously need alot of cash. i got to save up for alot of things and help my mum.
i can't be like last time, go out enjoy myself shopping.
but i really wish/wants to go out with clique.
i can no longer communicate with my dad. i don't understands him alr.
all we did chat is 'hi', 'bye'. Once a very very close dad, yet becoming this state.
i can no longer feel loved in the house. my mum got to care for my sis first, that's ofcourse. she'll be working very hard for cash too because dad doesn't give her.
i want cash. i want cash. i want cash. i want cash. i want cash. i want cash. i want cash. i want cash.
i can't feel much love with dearest. i'm tired now, really. it felt like one-sided love, although its not. i can't help but thinking of negative stuffs and shed tears. everything for me is all so sudden!
everything seems so wrong. i can't figure any solutions out. no one can understands how i feel because even i myself dk what am i feeling now. confused.

should i? should i not.
give up? give up not.